We have tens of thousands of thoughts every day. Mostly the same thoughts recur during the day, often to our detriment. Do you ever dwell on the same negative thoughts over and over?
Our thoughts often hold us back
Our thoughts are incredibly powerful; they create our reality. Reality is unique to each of us. We shape our reality by the things we tell ourselves, and the thoughts we have.
• Taking things personally. It is very easy to personalize things and jump to false conclusions.
• Thinking in extremes. This can also be a case of seeing things in black or white, it is all bad or all good. Sometimes we need to be able to see the shades of grey. Apparently there are at least 50 of them.
• Mind Reading. We often assume to know what other people are thinking of us. Chances are they are probably thinking about something else.
• Forcing our own rules on life. We all create rules around how we think things should be, we make up these rules based on our values, beliefs and other ‘evidence’ we gather in life.
• Filter out the positives. It is amazing how much we can focus on negative things. Often it takes one bad thing to ruin the day.
Recognise how we think
There are many things that contribute to how we form our thoughts We have control of all these factors, if we accept our personal responsibility for them.
• Beliefs. Our beliefs are convenient assumptions, how we believe things should be.
• Values. These are the things that are important to us and shape the thoughts we have. Values get to the very core of who we are inside.
• Playing victim. Bad things happen, but we can choose how we react to them. When we play victim we can let many negative thoughts loose.
• Placing rules on our lives. When we create unreasonable rules in our lives we set our mind on a course for negative thoughts.
• Defend our position. Sometimes we get so caught up defending our position, or making excuses for things we don’t let positive thoughts have a chance.
Thinking for success and happiness
There are a number of things we can do to keep our thoughts positive and moving us forward.
• Know what you want. Have a clear vision of what you want.
• Recognise your negative thinking. Recognise when negative thoughts are taking over and dismiss them.
• Make the change. By taking action towards fixing a problem or changing our situation we give our mind the opportunity for new more positive focus.
• Practice makes perfect. Be determined and persevere to have your mind focus on positive thoughts. If you slip don’t be overly hard on yourself, break the state and get the positive focus back.
• Talk to someone. It is amazing how much talking your problems over with someone can ease the burden.
• Gratitude. One of the most powerful things you can do with your life is to have an attitude of gratitude. When you are grateful, you train your sub-conscious mind to focus on positives.
It can be quite easy to slip into a negative mindset and wallow without realizing it. A key element of success and happiness is a positive outlook, which comes from our thoughts. Use the tools in this article to recognise where your thinking is at, and to lift it to where you want it to be.
If you would like any help with lifting your mindset, or understanding your values feel free to give me a call.